so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
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