Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Boobs speak an international language.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
