Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
