I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
