Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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