Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Randomize
