So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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