she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize