I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
