take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
Randomize
