she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
