Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
