I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
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