Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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