Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
