so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Randomize
