Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
