Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
