Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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