There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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