I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
