At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
