My balls are so social today.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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