It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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