Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Screwed.edu
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
