After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
