This dress was meant to end up on your floor
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
the liver wants what the liver wants
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
