So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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