Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
