he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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