if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Randomize
