You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
