Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He did a backflip because drugs
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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