I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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