using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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