he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Randomize
