he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize