u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
