normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
