She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I want to fling myself into the sun
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
