you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize