so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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