he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize