how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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