The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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