Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
My penis needs a shock collar
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Randomize
