none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
