i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
