mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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