I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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