So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Randomize
